Why the question “why” rarely gives us the answer

There is a real danger when self-reflecting. There are great reasons to self-reflect, but often, we try to figure out everything. And the reality is, sometimes it is impossible find the answer, go spiralling out of control but not move on.

For example, you won’t know for sure why others acted in a particular way. Introspection at this point is serving no purpose.

What question not to ask

The one not to ask is Why?

This is a question you probably never get the answer for. It may instead lead you to feel low, down, and even stressed and depressed.

Why? makes us feel there has to be an answer, and explanation, and our minds are great at finding answers, even if they have to make one up.

Why? is great at highlighting our limitations.

Why? reminds is of dark times, inhibits growth, which defeats the aim.

Instead, what is better is to ask myself other questions – like what, how, when. This has happened to be, how do I want to deal with it? What can I do? What do I want my story to be? There are so many great self-reflection questions to ask, but not why. Why keeps you stuck. And that is not the point. Because at some point, you need to draw a line and get on with living your life.